While You Were Sleeping…

Always a baby in one arm, a textbook in another...

Ever look back on your life and feel like you are watching a  movie? The plot & characters all seem so familiar, you may even have certain parts memorized line by line…yet you are a spectator. Removed and distanced from the actual events.

 That is my experience when I look back on my early years of motherhood. I can tell of specific events, and create a vivid picture of what life was like, yet it always feels as if I am telling someone elses’ story, instead of my own.

Most often, people ask how I managed to complete high school, and continue on through college with a young child (and later, children)  in tow. My answer: It was like sleepwalking. Literally. Anyone with young children knows that it is nearly impossible to complete a simple phone conversation-let alone write a research paper- when juggling the day-to-day tasks of parenting. My only option was to burn the midnight oil, and make the most of naptimes. While the baby slept, I worked. I read textbooks into the wee hours of the morning, and raced my way through papers during his naptime. I caught up on sleep in between classes, and became an avid coffee drinker. I look back on those years and remember night after night of lonely solitude in the living room. Just me, my homework, the humming of the fridge and the sporadic *click-clack-clackty-clack* of the keyboard. It seems like a dream. And in many aspects, it was. Even now, I find myself most productive in the late hours of the day, long after the bedtime stories have been read, and curtains drawn. Even now, I look back on the accomplishments of the past fourteen years and wonder if I am dreaming…

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